The Story

"All of these lines across my face
Tell you the story of who I am
So many stories of where I've been
And how I got to where I am"

I've talked about age a few times on here, as its obviously something that had weighed on my mind in recent years. I was having a difficult time in life, coming to terms with the fact that I'm getting older. However, there is no denying that it's happening. It's going to happen to everyone. Circle of life.... your time will come.

I have lines around my eyes....because I smiled and laughed a lot. I have my "what the fuck" lines between my eyes, because of people like you, gentle reader. The ones that make me stop and think "what the hell is the matter with you". I have lines around my mouth because I never stop talking, and I had a disgusting habit of smoking for 20 plus years. My hair is graying around the edges, letting everyone around me know that I'm getting on in my years. My skin is starting to sag. My tits hang so low that I could probably play hacky sack with them. The skin around my face has much less elasticity than it did previously.

For a while, I had a very difficult time with all of it, because society puts so much emphasis on how a person looks, especially women. I had somewhat of an epiphany in the last few years though. I. Don't. Give. A. Shit. This is who I am and I'm naturally getting older, and I am not going to fight it anymore. The thing is though, the things that the beauty magazines and movies don't always show, is that even with all of the physical signs of aging, they never discuss the positives. For instance, I'm smarter than you. Promise. I have tons more life experience. I've been through hell and back and  I've survived things you probably couldn't even comprehend. I have developed ways of coping with the world around me that has made me into one of the strongest people I have ever met. One thing that people always say about me, is that they love my sense of humor. It's dark and twisted, but I've developed it out of habit due to things that I've experienced.

Then... there's you. You are younger than my child. You can probably lay down without your breasts sliding into your armpits. You can probably get up in the morning and not have all of your joints sound like a giant bowl of Rice Krispies. You probably have a happy, bubbly outlook on life. You probably face each day with positivity and wonder and look forward to your amazing life. You are young and the world is your oyster. That doesn't make you better, however. Just different. That seems to be what certain people like, and that's their choice and I can't stop them from what they want.

I will not apologize for nature taking it's course. I won't apologize for my cynical and shitty attitude. I have lived more than you will ever know and I'm going to live through this. I'm going to come out of the other side of this in a much better place than I started. There's someone out there that will love every wrinkle, every gray hair, every inevitable liver spot. That person will love me for me and not go find a younger version of me. 

I'm old....and that's okay. I'm going to be just fine. Just enjoy it while you can. I promise that this WILL be you someday.